i just realized that i've had a bottle of ketchup sitting on my table for almost 24 hours. it wouldn't be that embarrassing if it were the worst offense, but the truth is that the open condiment bar on the dining room table is only a minor indication of how things look today at casa de la burton. items also found on the table: legos, unopened mail, lysol wipes, crayons, a glass of lemonade from last night's dinner, and bird seed (and i'm not even zoned for birds). we're talking squalor, people. straight up child-protective-services-red-flag wretchedness. so as i shake us free from the debris, i will focus on happier times. like this time exactly one week ago.